what no thief can steal

Death is always unexpected, even if you know it's coming. I know that sounds like a paradox but it's true. I woke up this morning knowing that my grandma could die at any moment. She had been in the hospital since Christmas Eve with a case of pneumonia that turned fatal and for the last week her lungs have been slowly filling with fluid, making it hard for her to breathe. She has been on 'comfort care' the last few days, meaning that she was taken of all the machines and medicines that were prolonging her life---and she was put on a morphine drip which would help her to die more peacefully. I have been praying the last few days that she would die sooner than later, so that she could escape her pain.

Before David and I went to go be with the rest of my family at the hospital this afternoon, I still had one grandparent left. Four hours later, I left the hospital grandparent-less. This now means my parents, aunts, and uncles are the new oldest generation of my family. which is strange to think about.

The most surreal moment was seeing my grandma take her last breath. I'm still unsure of how I feel about watching death occur, but this experience brought several thoughts to my mind. I thought about how she was born in 1920 and how different the world was then and how much she has seen it change over the span of her lifetime. I thought about how blessed she was to die in a warm hospital room with her family surrounding her, unlike so many others in the world who die cold and alone due to their circumstances of poverty. I thought about how it is SO true when people say you can't take anything with you when you die and that in the end, material possessions and wealth are so meaningless. I thought about the finite time we all are given here on Earth and how that makes time the most valuable gift.

After my grandma peacefully passed, a chaplain from the hospital came into the room and asked if she could read us a poem titled "Psalm from the Dying". There was one line that struck me in particular:


And all I take with me as I leave is your love
And the millions of memories of all that we have shared
So I truly enter my new life as a millionaire.



Rest in peace, Granny.